Friday, March 17, 2006

After much procrastination, the dairy farm was finally chosen and filmed for the movie. There were some moments of panic when it looked like our chosen location might not get snow the rest of the year, but a storm swept through there yesterday giving us the window we needed to capture it.

My contact in Wisconsin wanted me to be present for filming, but that was never in the cards. I am still bound to my desk. Its been four weeks since we started filming on the tv show. Boss man had said it would be 2-4 weeks before I'd be out on the tv set, but there are no signs that's the case - even when the movie finishes in April - another 3 weeks from now.

Who knows. I could be wrong, but at this point I refuse to even consider it as a possibility after what happened. I had no reason to think I wouldn't be on set at the start of filming this season till that call from my boss. All signs and indicators pointed to my presence on set - same as last year. Heck when I was hired, I was told the job required me to be on set. Part of what made it so attractive.

That's not to say I haven't been busy - most days are a constant juggling act of different projects for both the movie and the tv show. But I can feel the cloud of depression floating over my head. Regardless of whether its justified by my circumstances or not - its hanging there. Keeping me from getting to work as early as I should. Weighing me down during the day. I wish I could snap myself out of it - I have a job, a job that keeps a roof over my head, but its not the job I had last year. And that's what is really sticking in my head. Its not a job I love anymore and I just don't know how to fix it.