I wrote this in an email to a dear friend today and I think it sums up my life since I last wrote on blogger pretty well so I decided to post it:

Just so you don't think i dropped off the face of the earth and into an abyss.

Oh wait....I have!

I'm working at least 70-80 hours a week on this new movie. I'm bringing work home to do on the weekends. I'm getting paid shit and while everyone respects me and blah blah blah - i'm basically doing the job of an associate producer without the title, the credit or the pay. Its really starting to piss me off.

I'm never home. That sucks. I slept from 3A until 12:30P and I'm still exhausted. Fun stuff.

In the meantime I've been offered that agency job. $20K more a year plus bonuses and benefits. They even said they could take a month's notice - not including my two week vacation. But I still haven't given notice to my job or the other job the official okay.

Why is this you ask? Well I'd basically be black balling myself from working with any of these people ever again as I'd be walking off in the middle of a very hectic job where I'm responsible for way too many things. Did I mention I feel completely overwhelmed by the amount of work and things I have to juggle and keep straight every single day? People think I live in the office since I'm there so late every nite.

Plus I don't know that I want to work for these people. I met the second agent - the head agent - finally. He made me wait for two hours - granted he kept calling - but still. Then when he arrived, he basically harrassed our waitress. "What's good to eat here?" As she rattled off the items on the menu, he kept saying Next, Next. ie she would say sandwiches and he would respond "Boring, Next" and so forth. Plus all he talked about was money, money, money.

Basically he wants to be able to "exploit" (not that he used such an ugly word) his clients in as many ways possible for more money and bring in new clients to boot.

This is where I would come in.

But I really need the money and my hours are killing me so I don't know what to do. Rock and a hard place.

I haven't even finished my spec script for tv show yet cause I quite literally don't have the time.

I'm cooked.

Its too late for the fork - just hose me down and start over.